I take it on the chin every day man, this is the only place I bitch about it because that's what everyone does in these gay ass threads every weekend. I just feel like shit because I'm about to turn another year older with nothing to show for it. But you are correct objectively. Not to be a fag but I could genuinely live with almost all of it if I had a bigger dick but that's not really in the cards. Call me gay or whatever but I genuinely believe that if I woke up with a 7 incher tomorrow a LOT of my mental health problems would go away because I just feel like a bitch. Everything I try to do feels like compensating and its kind of true. I'm just in my feelings lately like what I said to the other anon but I do appreciate your more positive spin on things. My mental programming is negative because I've behaved like a loser my whole life and its not unfounded at all, so its tough to lie to myself like that with no victories under my belt. I do good at work because I have an objective point-a-to-point-b routine, but left to my own devices and free will I just fall apart and accomplish nothing. I try to save up or lose weight or whatever else but the road ahead is so daunting and long, since I've been a loser for so long I begin to ask myself why even bother? Its hard to keep myself in line but nobody else cares enough to try to help me be accountable. Its a demon I have to face on my own and historically I've proven many times that I don't have what it takes to win. I dunno man. These feelings have come and gone before. I can't kill myself because my mom would be sad and my cat wouldn't understand. I just have to tough it out again, for better or worse.

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